My four-year-old daughter and I had a conversation yesterday that got me thinking. We have an extended family tradition on Christmas Eve where we all get together to do a large service project, have dinner, and put on a comedy/talent show. Now, my girl is a hoot on the stage. She loves putting on shows and performing for others, so when I told her this, her eyes grew to the size of the chocolate-covered cookie-dough balls in my fridge (which are huge, mind you, you never skimp on cookie-dough balls). It was as if someone else told both of us what came out of my mouth next: “Sharing your talents is the greatest gift you can give to Jesus.” You can stop here, if you are satisfied with the answer of giving Christ your talents of singing, acting, writing, playing an instrument, or what have you. These are incredible gifts, and I in no way want to demean their value. But I’m going to dive a little deeper." I want you, my reader, to understand something. I’m an ENFJ. If you’ve studied Meyers-Briggs at all, you understand that people of this personality type are dedicated, imaginative, organized, and the ultimate people-people. We understand others on a level we can’t explain. I’ve been able to successfully predict a LOT of weddings in my lifetime, I know when my husband has had a bad day even when he tries to hide it, and, on occasion, I’ve been able to convince others to do something amazing by letting them think it was their idea. But we have a dark side. I have a dark side. It varies from individual to individual, but for me, this dark side is the temptation to manipulate others. My siblings can attest to it, my husband can attest to it, my parents can attest to it. Often, it’s for selfish reasons or an attempt to have my own way, but not always. For good reasons or no, people hate being manipulated. So I told myself to put the tendency away. I asked forgiveness and I shut that part of myself up, ashamed of this “talent”… Until I reread a certain story. Call it manipulation, call it influence. This. Is. Dangerous. I won’t deny it. I’ve experienced this power and it’s destructive abilities and it scares the everliving crap out of me. BUT. It’s also a good gift. People with this trait have changed the world. Jennifer Lawrence. Martin Luther King Jr. Barack Obama. We were born with inherent traits given to us by a loving and detail-oriented Heavenly Father. They were NOT given to us by mistake. These are tools, and, like any other tool, they can be used to create or destroy. To mend or tear apart. The greatest gift we can give to our Heavenly Father, to Christ, is to use these abilities we’ve been so afraid to access, for the betterment of humankind. He didn’t give them to us to shove away in a closet somewhere and forget. When you work to give your child exactly what they asked for for Christmas, when are you happier? When it sits forgotten at the bottom of the toy chest? Or when they bring it out every day, even if it might cause some contention? Or, even better, when they share that gift with others, showing what’s really amazing about it and how incredibly grateful they are you gave it to them? I know you might laugh at the improbability of that last option, but consider it for a second. How do you treat the gifts your God has given you? Even the ones you don’t understand yet or think are weaknesses? Even the ones that you’re too ashamed to bring out? We are not given weaknesses. We only misuse our strengths. Learning to use them properly, for the benefit of our brothers and sisters in humanity, is the greatest gift we could ever give in this lifetime.
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AuthorRegan Guerra is a Personality Geek. As an ENFJ 4w3, she dreams big, wanting to build a ranch where others can rediscover themselves and learn to reimagine life the way it's supposed to be. Archives
February 2017
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